Photo by Jimmy Dean on Unsplash
Traditions? What traditions?!
Last month, we published a blog about how to do Thanksgiving this pandemic year, aka Zoom-Giving. Now, we’re only a few days from Christmas, the second most celebrated holiday around the world, behind New Year’s. Frankly, these end-of-the-year holidays were not that big of a deal when I was growing up. We put up a fake tree, hung some ornaments, exchanged gifts with immediate family and invited 20+ people over for Chinese food. As a young adult, my extended family and I gathered for a meal, with or without traditional American holiday dishes. In the last 10 years since getting married, my husband and I have done everything from ordering Chinese takeout n’ binge watching movies, to visiting my aunts, to trying out big baking projects, just the two of us. All that to say, we don’t stick to any strict tradition from one year to the next.
As I reflect on how we have little to no traditions around this time of the year, I understand Christmas can be a big deal to many people.
A reminder of Christmases past
It all starts with putting the lights up after Thanksgiving, or for some of us - even before! A tree is carefully chosen over hot chocolate. Ornaments from 3rd grade arts n’ crafts are displayed. Christmas shopping is done, last-minute or in advance, and presents wrapped and carefully arranged underneath the tree. Perhaps there’s milk and cookies for Santa, and opening of presents on Christmas Day. There’s definitely the spread of holiday food, maybe a green bean casserole made the way Uncle Steven would’ve liked, or curried carrots from Auntie Darlene’s recipes.
Then there’s the hustling and bustling around the house, of kids running around, of adults directing a gazillion questions at college kids who are home, of someone having too much to drink, and these days it’s not Christmas without a debate over a plant-based vs. a Paleo diet.
While many of us sorely miss being together, we so easily forget the stress of the holidays when we did gather. During a pandemic year when we’ve been cooped up at home or when most of our social interactions have been through Zoom, any face-to-face, 3-D, live person contact is preferred over staring into a screen.
Almost there. Don’t give in.
Yet, we’re so close. We made it this far! We’ve done this for 10 months now and the vaccine is near. Whether you plan to get vaccinated or will wait for herd immunity, this may be the only and final Christmas holiday you’d need to celebrate in a special, non-traditional way.
You’ve spent all this time staying safe enough while also staying sane enough. Now is not the time to let loose. While the quality and access to healthcare might differ, depending, unfortunately, on coverage and/or your skin color, COVID does not discriminate. Just because you haven’t contracted it thus far does not mean you will not in the future. Depending on how you choose to spend your Christmas, you’ll either be grieving the Christmas you never had and moving on from it. Or, if you do get COVID, the best case scenario is you’re quarantined for two-weeks at home in January where your freedom will truly be limited. You could also come up with a new way to Christmas this year and make it special in spite of it all.
YOLO is true either way. If you only get to defy Christmas traditions this one year, what would you do?
Ideas for how to Christmas this year
Stay in your jammies the whole day!
Buy everyone matching jammies and Zoom part of the festivities, or lack there of
Go for a nice, socially distanced walk
Try a new recipe
Bake something. If it doesn’t turn out, throw it in the freezer and save it for “later”
Challenge yourself to eat anything but traditional holiday food
Still bake the turkey, stuffing, yams and the whole nine yards but savor it with your immediate family
Play a new board game as a family
Have a Marvel, LOTR, Harry Potter or Netflix marathon
Treat it like any other day off
Tackle a home project
Cozy up under a blanket and read a book
As you look at this list, you’d realize anything goes, except when you take a risk that could have negative consequences.
Looking forward to 2021 with you
Unlike the magic of a light switch that turns off 2020 and turns on 2021, 2021 will come to us in the way of a dimmer. We’ll wake up to a continuation of what was 2020, but hopefully, we’ll be moving in the right direction.
Our counselors here at People Bloom wish you a warm, safe and special nonetheless Christmas and New Year’s.
Best,
Ada
Ada Pang is the proud owner of People Bloom Counseling, a Redmond psychotherapy practice. She helps unhappy couples find safety and connection in their relationship. She also helps cancer thrivers and their caregivers integrate cancer into their life stories. This Christmas, she will Zoom with her in-laws’ family on Christmas morning, bake onion rings for the first time and watch shows she has cued up on Netflix.